On Friday, we went to see the first high risk OB. I must say I was very impressed with the place. I was there for 4 hours and talked for an hour each to two different doctors. They said they’d been talking about my case for a week and studying my records. That alone brought comfort to me. I think they are rather fascinated with us. They said it was very rare, if ever, that someone would have a loss such as mine and subsequently get pregnant with triplets. They talked to me at length and asked very pointed questions about what happened when I lost Greyson and I could tell they learned a few things not in my records. They talked to me about all the elevated risks of… basically everything and the precautions such as cerclage and progesterone shots later in pregnancy. They said they would be watching me very closely.
I expressed concern about bypassing my regular OB, this place is an hour away and what if there’s an emergency. I was told there is a Maternal Fetal Transport system that will come get us, where ever we are, helicopter if needed. I liked hearing that…like having my own personal bat signal. I also believe this hospital has the best NICU in my area and would be the best place to deliver. It’s a level 3 and I was told there is a neonatal doctor physically there 24/7. We go back in 3 weeks…which I know is good…it’s less than a month. But previously I’ve been spoiled by seeing the Sparks every week.
They are all three doing well. The smaller one seems to have caught up. This makes me happy. I can already feel this pregnancy advancing faster than my previous one. They are already pushing on me some days and every day I feel them siphoning off of me….my energy and nutrition. I cherish feeling that… but …. I wish I weren’t so scared. Mom just told me she wished I would glow like I did with my Sweet Pea. Don’t get me wrong I’m enjoying every single moment. But also every single moment I’m terrified that I will lose them all because I wasn’t strong enough to sacrifice one. I also worry about money a lot. In whatever form, be it babysitter or daycare or something else, I figure childcare will cost about half my income and I’m not sure we can make it on the other half alone. Mom already wants to talk about adding on to my small home but I know that just will not be possible.
I’m hoping that as time goes on these fears will quiet. We’ve done alright so far and I should just go on the thinking we will continue to do so.
Working on the premise that the average triplets come at 33 weeks or so and are by then developed enough to survive outside….9 weeks down … 24 to go.