Social Worker called today to tell me that Aunt has asked them to find a permanent placement for Sunny. We talked about logistics and getting Sunny’s stuff from Aunt’s place. They are insisting that Sunny not be told yet. They want to do it next week, when Social Worker, Counselor and a supervisor can be here to tell her together. It feels so wrong to me. This limbo has to be a frightening hell for her. The kid has a right to know what is happening in her life.
Sunny’s counselor visited today. She spoke to Sunny and I together and each of us separately. We played Go Fish and she asked Sunny about what happened when she left her aunt and that the aunt was feeling sad when she’d seen her last week. To me, she spoke of attention getting behaviors and more worrisome self harming behaviors which might come up and asked me to be sure to check on her when she was having time to herself especially during or after what she termed “an episode”. Together, we told her that The Counselor was not going to take her home today but she made it sound like it wasn’t her job to transport kids and that she’d never done that.
After Counselor left, I wrote a schedule for the next two days, explaining exactly what I thought we were going to be doing. This seemed to help her and she asked fewer questions about what we were going to do or ones of the “can we..” variety. Seems like a habit to be continued.
When she would ask if she was going home today or this week or whatever, I finally started answering that I wasn’t sure but if I had to guess she’d be staying for a while longer. She keeps saying that it seems like a million years since she’s seen Aunt S and that she can’t survive if she doesn’t get to see her soon. Sometimes, I think she must be intuiting what is happening. She is starting to say “home” rather than “your house” and “our” cats, dog, yard or whatever.
Tonight she found two tiny baby frogs and of course wanted to keep them as pets. Finally, she relented and agreed that I should let them loose while she was in the shower. But when she realized that were really gone, she started crying and asked why she couldn’t have anything of her own. She allowed me to sit next to her and comfort her. A little later she gave a hug and a kiss. This is the first affection she’s shown me outside of an occasional taking of my hand. This seems like progress to me.